Showing posts with label brad news. Show all posts
Showing posts with label brad news. Show all posts

Sunday, January 31, 2010

IN WHICH A MYSTERY IS SOVLED


SURP PERPS BRADCASTIN AT YA -- WHILE TEH CATS' AWAY THE BLOG HITS PAYDAY-- THE SHERLCK HOLMES OF THE GAYLORD WHITEMAN HOMES HAS PEREFORMED TEH DIAGNOSTIC AND IT CLOSE TO THE ROOT OF TEH GRAET BLOG MYSTERY WHY ARE HALF THE HITS FROM IMGS.GOOG AND DO TEHY RESPECT THE CONTENT OR IN SEARCH OF CHEAP THRILLS.?

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ALSO NOTE THAT AUG 2007 WHICH IS #1 GOOGLEFRITZ PAGE ALL TIME ALSO CONTAINS A CLASSIC POLITICAL POSTING TAHT REPRESENTS TEH HIGHEST STANDARDS OF PUPLIC JOURNALOISM AND LEVELHANDED MORALS LETS HAVE A BIG ROUND OF APPLAUSE FOR Key Demographic Splinter Groups


OBSERVE : LOKING AT THE IMAGE NAMES OF TAHT MONTH WAS THE BRAEKTHROGH:
omenanyytit-core.jpg
phone_thong.gif
38814_formatted_brodown.jpg
furf.jpg
togas.jpg
office-farts.gif
superfriends.jpg

THOUGHT IT WAS TEH TOGAS BUT I AM NOT ENTIRE SURE OF WAHT THE DATA SET SUGGESTS MAYBE I'D PUT IT OUT OUT THERE CROWDSUROCE THE ROWING OF DUCKS NOAM HUSSEIN? TEH IMPLICATIONS FOR SAERCH ENGINE OPMITIZATION ARE BOUNDLESS EXPECT CHANGES BIG CHANGES TO COME I.E. MEMO TO SELF RENAME ALL HTE GRAPHICS AS IF A GIGGLING CHILD

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ALSOSIDEBAR : NEW SHERLOCK HLOMES IS PRETTY RAD BUT TEH KEY IS AS AWLAYS LOW XPECTAIONS GET SOMEONE TO TELL U IT SI=UCKS BEFORE U WATCH IT IS ALL

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ALSOFRITZ : Results 1 - 8 of 8 for "EVERYBODY MUST GET PWNED".. (0.31 seconds)

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ALSOEXHORT : I WUOLD ENCOURAGE MY COLLEAGUES WHO LURK BEHIND TEH CUT AND PASTE TO EMERGE AS FILLY FLEDGED PERSONAS WHIT EDITORIAL VOICE. I AM TALKING IN PRATICULAR TO : THE SPIRIT OF NOSTALGIA, TEH MASKED INDIEROCKER A.K.A. T.M.I., HIPPIE HATER, NACHO_BIDNESS, C.P.R. A.K.A. THE COCKPUNCHING ROBOT, RENEGADE ARBORIST, RBK2F, THE FANTASY PLAYERS, YACHTROCKER, AND DAVE SCHECK

CALLIN U OUT ::[];; YOU CANT SPELL COLLECTIVE W/O I'VE

Friday, November 27, 2009

IN WHICH TEH LIFE OF DIOGENES IS EXAMINED


BRAD NEWS IN THE HOUS

SUP STUDENTS !CE AGIN BACK IS TEH INCERDIBLE THE CRIME MANIMAL THE CANNABINOL B PUBLIC ENEMNY NUMBA1 H1N1 BRAD NEWS BOOOOOTCHES BOOGIE DOWN BUT NOT OUT


TEH PUBLIC IS UNAWARE OF A GRAET MAN DIOGENES THE CYNIC, THANKS TO GOOGLEFRITZ HQ FOR ACCES TO PUBLIC


POINTS TO WIT:


1) DIOGENE'S POPS WAS A BIG BANKER BUT THE ORALCLE (AT DELPHI MAYBE U HEARD OF IT) TOLD D. TO GO OUT &DEFACE THE CUURENCY & HE DID SO. MUCH CHISELING OF COINS LATER< RUN OUT OF TWON ON A RAIL.

2) THEN DIOGENES LIVED IN A MOTHAFCUCKIN TUB BELONGING TO TEH TEMPLE OF CYBELE IN ATHENS SEEN ABOVE. TO INURE SELF FROM VICCISSITUDES OF WAETHER. THEN HE SAW A KID DRINK FROM CUPpED HANDS AND SAYS BRILLIANT! BRAEKS HIS ONLY PIOSESSION A WOODEN BOWL. WHO NEEDS SHIT ANYWAY AMIRITE?

3) HIS SPIRITAUL MASTER ANTISTHENES WAS SUPER HARDCORE AND BASICALY BEAT TEH SHIT OUT HIM W/AUSTERITY PROGRAM AND FISTS OF PHLOSOPHICLA FURY. D RESPONDS BY GETTING SUPER MAD AUSTERER THAN TEH MASTER AVOIDING AERTHLY PLEASURES FOLLY PRETENSE VANITY SOCAIL CLIMBING SELFDECEPTOIN AND VANITY NOT NECCS. IN THAT ORDER

4) HIS SLAVE JUST DITCHED HIM & WEHN PPL WERE LIEK WHATS UP? HE JUST WAS LIKE DUDE CAN LIVE W/O ME SO I CAN LIVE W/O DUDE . THIS BLEW SOEM MINDS. D WROTE SOEM BOOKS BUT THEY ALL GOT LOST HE ALSO INVENTED TEH WORD COSMOPOLITAN

5) PLATO WAS MAKING UP SOCRATES AT TEH TIME AND THOUGHT HE WAS AL CLEVER SAYIN MAN IS NAUGHT BUT A FEATHERLESS BIPED. DIOGENES WAS YO I GOT THIS. HE PLUCK A CHIKCEN AND BRING IT IN GOT CHA BOI RIHGT HERE A HUMAN PER DESCRIP. PLATO DID A SLOW BURN, ADDED W/ BROAD TOENAILS TO OPERATIVE DEFINITOIN. ZING

6) IN MEETING W/ MOTHERFUCKIN ALEXADNER TEH GREAT, D'S 1ST IMMPRESSION WAAS YO GTFO MY SUNLIGHT LOL. ALX WAS IMPRESSED. TEHN DIOGENES WAAS LIEK YO CHECK OUT PILE OF BONES - CAN U TELL IF THIS CORPSES IS SLAVE BONES OR (YR DAD) KING BONES? CUZ I CAN'T. A THE G STUNNED, WHOA, PUNK ROCK THIS GUY IS FOR REAL IF I WERE NOT SO AWESOME (SEE, GREAT) I WUOLD WANT TO BE THIS GUY

7) HE CARRIED A LAMP AROUND ALL TIME DURING DAY SO CITIZENS ASK WHY. HE THEN REPLY HES LOOKING FOR AN HONEST MAN SUBTEXT: YOU SUCK

8) WENT SHIP VOYAGING KIDNAPPED BY PIRATES AND SOLD INTO SLAVERY(!). PIRATES WANT TO SELL HIM TO A CORINTHIAN ASK WAHT HIS SKILLS ARE, HE SAYS IM ONLY GOOD AT GIVING ORDERS BRO< SELL ME TO A MAN WHO NEEDS A MASTER. PUNK ROCKNESS OF THIS WAS SELF EVIDENT, SO HE THEN BECOMES A LIFE COACH IN CORINTH

9) TO DEMONSTRATE TO TEH GREEKS THAT CIVILIZATION IS REGRESSIVE HE TOTES/ACTUALS PISSES ON PPL WHO SAY STUPID SHIT, GETS UP ON STAGE AND TAKES A DUMP AND FLIPS EVERYONE THE BIRD (MIDDLE FIGNER) FOR REALS ALSO EATING IN TEH MARKETPLACE WHICH WAS JUST AS BAD AT TEH TIME. SOEM REAL J'GG'C ALLIN STUFF THERE

10) HOW HE DIED IS NOT CERTIAN, EITHER ATE RAW OCTOPUS, WAS BITTEN BY DOG, OR HELD HIS BRAETH TO PROVE POINT. HIS WILL WAS THROW MY CORPSE OUTSIDE WALLS TO BE EAT BY ANIMALS. PPL WERE LIKE REALLY? YES JUST GIVE ME A STICK TO PROTECT MYSELF. BUT BUT AT THAT POINT U WILL LACK AWARENES! WELM THEN I WONT GIVE A FUCK WILL I. ASSHOLE. QED ALL IN TEH GAME. THEN WAHTEVER HAPPENED AND THEY BUILT A STATUE OF A DOG FOR HIS GRAVE

LEARN BY EXAMPLE PPL IT IS NOT TOO LATE TO BE SAVED
DIOGENTOLOGY NOW AVAILABLE 5 LOW PAYMENTS OF 79.99
CONTACT YR LOCAL GOOGLEFRITZ & FOLLOW BRAD_NEWS ON TWITTER


(googlefritz has recieved promotional considerations for this post)
Your search - DIOGENTOLOGY - did not match any documents.

Thursday, July 02, 2009

NEWS U CAN UES WITH BRAD NEWS



HI IM BRAD NEWS AND TGHIS IS NEWS U CAN USE


TOP STUFF TO WATCH LIVE STREAMIN OFF TEH NET FLICKS:

1. NUMBER ONE CRANK HI VOLTAGE O WAIT THATS NOT OUT YET SO BUY IT FROM TEH CHINESE LADY

2. POINT BLANK DUDE LEE MARVIN CANT BEAT IT

3. DOCTOR WHO TEH NEW ONES. DONT ASK, DONT TELL THE GIFT KEEPS GIVIN

4. ZEP HOW TEH WEST WAS ONE DURRR

5. THAT MIKE MOWER DOES GOOD DOCUMENTRY FOR THE KNOWLEDGING HE PROB GOT SOMETHIN OUT NOW


SOLID BROS BEST O LUCK HONORING AMERICA WEEKEND STYLE. VISION QUEST IS GOING GREAT YOU GUYS


FUCK DUDE MY BEAR GOT OUT UV MY YARD, KINDA WORROIED BUT DIDNT WAN TO SAY ANYTHING

I BEST TRANKWILLIZE THAT BEAR LIABILITY IS A BEAR IN/OF SELF NOME SANE

HES NOT SPOSED TO EAT SUHLAMI BUT HE LUV TEH ITALIAN COMBOS, DUDE WIT TEH SAMMY IS LUCK WINSTON (MY BEAR BUDDIE) DINT KICK HIS SORRE ASS

FUCK I GOTA GET WINSTON


FURTHERMORE

Thursday, April 30, 2009

keeps on fritzing along


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Your search - "MOAR LIKE FAUXBAMA AMIRITE?" - did not match any documents.

No results found for "fairy godflesh".


...in other news, our colleague Brad News has begun tweeting. This changes everything.

Friday, April 24, 2009

CHECK THIS SHIOT OUT


WAHT IS UP MY HOT TATTOED KOREAN GRILFREND NOT ANSWER IPHONE WTF

WARE HAVE U GOEN? MEANTIME CHECKITOT THE NEW YOTUBERSTAR:


SHE WAS RLY SICK SO I AM WORRIET

PLUS I GEV HER MY RENT MONIES

HAI WATE WHERE ARE MY KEES?

I AM SUER IT WILL BE OK

YEAH I'LL JUST WATE ON MY STEP TILL SHE COMES HOAM

FRIST BOARN TO BE NAMED AMIRITE NEWS

WHY SHE FRLIRT ON THIS GUY?

HEY! JoE TEH PLUMBER RUUULLLLEEEZZZZZZ

Friday, January 23, 2009

HEY REMEMBER WHEN FRIDAYS WERE YOUTUBERSTAR DAYS?


SOME NOSTALGIA THERE UNDER THE LINK. THEY ALWAYS PUT SOMETHING THERE BUT I BET U NEVER CHECK RIGHT

SO ANYWAY I WAS IN ENGLAND

THIS IS YOUR NUMBA UNO HOMEBOY HERE BRAD NEWS BEGGED MY WAY BACK FROM BLOG EXILE CUZ HAD TO SHARE RAD YOUTUBERSTAR AKA MY FUTURE SPOUSAL AGREEMENT BEIMNG AWESOME ALL OVER THE INTERNET HER PEARTNESS SHINES FROM WITHIN

YEA ITS A DRUM SOLO BOOTCHES ENJOY

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Brad found a poem



he wants us to post:


A WORD ON STATISTICS
by Wislawa Szymborska
(translated from the Polish by Joanna Trzeciak)

Out of every hundred people,
those who always know better:
fifty-two.

Unsure of every step:
almost all the rest.

Ready to help,
if it doesn’t take long:
forty-nine.

Always good,
because they cannot be otherwise:
four — well, maybe five.

Able to admire without envy:
eighteen.

Led to error
by youth (which passes):
sixty, plus or minus.

Those not to be messed with:
four-and-forty.

Living in constant fear
of someone or something:
seventy-seven.

Capable of happiness:
twenty-some-odd at most.

Harmless alone,
turning savage in crowds:
more than half, for sure.

Cruel
when forced by circumstances:
it’s better not to know,
not even approximately.

Wise in hindsight:
not many more
than wise in foresight.

Getting nothing out of life except things:
thirty
(though I would like to be wrong).

Balled up in pain
and without a flashlight in the dark:
eighty-three, sooner or later.

Those who are just:
quite a few, thirty-five.

But if it takes effort to understand:
three.

Worthy of empathy:
ninety-nine.

Mortal:
one hundred out of one hundred –
a figure that has never varied yet.

Thursday, October 02, 2008

ALL THNIGS MUST PASS


LATER DUDES. BROSEPH STALIN ILL MISS U MOST OF ALL

I GUESS IN RETRO SPECK I SHOULD NOT HAVE CHANGE TEH PASSWORD TO BRADNEWSISAWESOME

TEH BOARD OF GFRITZ DIRECTORS HAVE ME IMPRISONED AT A SECURE LOCATION AND I REDILY RELINQUISH TEH REINS I HAVE SO ABUSED. WILL SEND POSTS AND HOEPFULLY LINK SOME TRACKBACKS & SUCH.

OMNES RELINQUITE SPESH OVOS INTRANTES, PPL. HOLLA CHA BOI

SEND FAN MAIL VIA TEH USUAL AND KNOW THaT U ARE LOVED

--BRAD NEWS

"Let life happen to you. Believe me: life is in the right, always."

Wednesday, October 01, 2008

GETTIN MAD AGGRO & WILIN OUT

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Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic

--BRAD NEWS

HAVING THE HANGOVER GANG OVER


AMERICAN HONEY SHOTS IS THE DEVIL. THE LIQUOR GIRLS WERE DRESSED LIKE JOHN CUOGAR MELLONCAMPS AND THEY HIT ME WITH A PADDLE. FACE TO FACE WITH MY OWN BROTALITY

FELLOW GUESTBLOGGER RUSHKOPF BEEN KILLIN IT OVER AT THE DOUBLE B . I NEVER SAW THIS GUYS MOVIES BUT HE"S MAD AS HELL TOO

YEAH ITS ROCKTOBER. SO WHAT?

No results found for "BRAD NEWS PWNS".
BRAD NEWS = A MAVERICK

--BRAD NEWS

Monday, September 29, 2008

GGOGLEFRITZ IS NOT SAFE FOR WORK

NOW THIS IS HAPPENING

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Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic

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NEW LOW, HASBRO



I CANT BELIVE IT MYSELF BUT THIS WEEKEND I BROKE UP A GIRL FIGHT. TEH SHAME DIDNT HIT UNTIL I TURNED AROUND & I SAW THE SAD FACES OF SPECTATING SMOKERS. WELL THERES NO TAKIN IT BACK, FELLAS

DEBATES?: LIKE THE BARD SAYS FULL OF SOUNDS & FURY SIGNIFYING NOTHING
AND MODERN DAY WARRIOR MEAN MEAN PRIDE, TOO


DONT WORRY PUNKS YOULL GET YR BLOG BACK FOR ROCKTOBER



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--BRAD NEWS (still AWESOME)

Friday, September 26, 2008

FUC!!!!!

FUC I TOTALLY KICKED THE LAMP SOCKET OUT THE WALL AND ITS TOTALLY DARK IN HERE FUC
GOTTA KEEP THE BRAND ALIVE DUDE

Your search - AS AVCDSAA - did not match any documents.

Your search - SOIR0IOJM - did not match any documents.

HAVE I MENTIONED THAT IT IS PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME

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THAT BONO GUYS PRETTY COOL I THINK WHAT DO YOU THINK PLEASE LEAVE NOTE IN COMMENTS K? NO COMMENTS SO FAR

GOT MY EYE ON THIS DUDE
WHATS MORE HARDCORE THAN A BLACK FLAG NECKTIE? I DIDNT THINK SO

hey WHATS THE DIFFERENCE BTW SHIT LAME AND RED HOT AWESOME?
GGFRITZ AND GGFRITZ WITH BRAD NEWS, PPL!!!!!!!



-- BRAD NEWS

He can't debate Barack Obama because he's got to go to Washington and save the economy? It's like the biggest 'dog ate my homework' in history.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

ROUGH BEAST, WHAT


SO I GOT OUT MY OLD ALLIGATOR COSTUME... I REALLY LIEK TO KNOCK THINGS OVER WITH THE TAIL
ITS NOT A SEX THING, HEY HALLOWEEN IS COMING


Did you mean: "RENEGADE GUEST BLOGGER"

Information No results found for "RENEGADE GUESTBLOGGER".

MORE LIKE WORLD"S GREATEST COCKBLOCKER, AMIRITE?


OH YEAH I CHANGED YOU PASSWORD< style="text-align: justify;">-- BRAD NEWS


Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

FUC U TALKIN BOUT ALIENATING A READERSHIP

MAN UP BOYS & GIRLS THIS IS TEH BRADSTER KEEPIN IT ALL TOO REAL

THIS GUYS LIKE A TOTAL DICK I MEAN I USED TO WORK AT UNION OYSTER AND I COULD TOTALLY GET A BEER THERE WHEN I WAS LIKE 19


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GOES LIKE THIS:
1) FLLOYD -- ANIMALS
2) ACE & THE GANG - DESTROYER (FROM BEFORE)
3) JAMES GANG -- ALL THAT JOE WALSH SHIT
4) ALL THE REST OF JOE WALSH SHIT
5) DUDE! ALMOST FORGOT 2122
666)METALLICA NUF SAID



"Attention all planets of the solar federation
We have assumed control." - NEIL FUCKIN' PEART


-- BRAD NEWS


Tuesday, September 23, 2008

NUH UH


DID NOT SAY I WAS FOR MCCAIN
I'M A LIBERTARIAN I'M JUST SAYIN THEY BOTH MAKE GOOD POINTS.
GOTTA HAVE FAITH IN THE SYSTEM, SCRO!!

BOUT GET BALLS DEEP IN SOME BREFFUS BURRITO


HOLLA CHA BOI

“I can calculate the movement of the stars, but not the madness of men.”
– Sir Isaac Newton, after losing a fortune in the South Sea bubble



-- BRAD NEWS


OUCH, VOLATILITY DUDE


BEEN LOSING A SHIT TON OF MONEY DAY TRADING YO. THIS BLOGGING SHIT BETTER TAKE TEH PAIN AWAY. SHORT MY EATS!


ISLAY SMS. THAT"S MY SHIT.

BONG BONG IS COOL BY ME BROS. CAN'T THE BLOGS GAT ALONG? THIS IS RAD.




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-- BRAD NEWS

Monday, September 22, 2008

TOTALLY RADICAL

EASE UP DOGGY U MAD

IMA BLOG THE SHIT OUTA THIS

JUST CHILL AND ILLEGALLLY DOWNLOAD The BEST ROCK NO MONEY CAN BUY:
KISS/DESTROYER

No results found for "overintellectual whiners".

-- BRAD NEWS

somebody is slackin'

um weren't we assposed to have a guestblogger in September? The ancient enemy (broingbroing) has the happy mutant Rushkoff (BLOG WAR!)... we need to fight fire with meteors!

Where in the world is Brad News?